i Love my friends
and i love my boyfriend
bit of a random post
but tbh they will never know how much they mean to me
i mean theres
hellouise: weve like only just started hanging out together out of school, but like were so similar n we can talk about anything and everything together.
Rach: shes one of my bests m8s, but her boyfriends started slaggin me off to ryan n rach n slaggin my ryan off to me, basically being a prick, hes also checking other girls out n making it obvious when shes with him. its fucking disgusting. i dont want that pig to fuck our friendship up.
but i think he just might.
ryan: i LOVE you to bits, and i mean it i absoloutly love you. lol CAPS dont show u how much! you cheer me up when im upset, you look after me.
there not gonna read this
they dont know bout this account
iv had a bowl of cereal, a salad n 2 yoghurts (in the past 2 or 3 days)
im in the 20's still fat i know, but its better than the 30's n even the 40's yes iv been in them both.
im so close to 8st now
i want to get to 8st 5lb then ill have lost 2st!!
had very good weekend
did some base for the first time yesterday
lost 4lbs over night!!
no idea how. no appetite at all. not even the im bored ill go make something to eat appetite.
not ate anything todayyyyyyy :D:D:D:D:D:D
n i dont think ill be able to tomorrow
oh im in love with this lovely stuff.
on a bad note
i usually sometimes eat a lil bit each day
but today i couldnt swallow it
i had it in my mouth and all of a sudden i felt a sudden urge to be sick
like if i ate this then i would throw up the minute it got near my throat.
i dont kno what that means, but im worried/ish.
on a good note
i feel so ill right now but so fucking happy
my head hurts
i feel sick
but i love it
im finally happy, iv got an absoloutly gorgeous new boyfriend.
i think im in love
and iv lost some more weight.
well iv split up with my boyfriend
im not upset, although i am for him, he isnt taking it to well
iv hardly ate anything today so im very very happy
fasts are so much easier when ur single!
i dont hav to worry bout eating when i go round to his all the time
in the long run
we will both be happier apart
i feel so rubbish
i dont want to leave the house
i dont want anyone to see me
i feel like i need alcohol or some kind of drug to make me feel complete.
everyday i start to feel depressed at certain times (mainly lunch for some strange reason)
iv quit smoking
even when i dont eat for days, i feel so fucking fat, so disgusting.
im sat in school wishing i could be at home exercising.
im so stressed out and upset but i have no idea why
my friends are starting to worry, there saying i should get help
i dont think i need help, i kno iv got a little bit of a problem but im far from needing help.
i feel so fucking helpless and shit n i hate it.
i cant even remember how it feels to not worry about food.
i sometimes dont wanna go to my boyfriends becuz i know i will have to eat.
i just need people to talk to who understand what im going through, but i cant find nyone who does.
add me if you want to chat
doin well not ate anything today did 20 mins jogging :D
today i had to eat as my mum is watching over me
3 mini kit-kats 107 cals each
so tht is
508Kcals for today
5 mins walking up and down stairs
5 mins on step machine
5 mins of sit ups
5 mins of weights
30 mins exercise
down to 137 wanna get to 130 by 10th oct
well today i did fantastic till after school
i went to brents
ad some erb' n ate like a fucker
ill fast it off heheehehe
i ate like a pig
one flake praline
a galaxy milkshake
small bowl of cereal with a bit of semi skimmed milk
and half a pot of muller light yoghurt